What is tantric sex and how do you practice it?

Have you ever heard of tantric sex? It’s an ancient practice that blends spirituality, emotional connection, and physical pleasure to create a deeper, more fulfilling sexual experience . Rooted in the tantric traditions of Hinduism and Buddhism, tantric sex isn’t just about physical gratification. It’s also about expanding awareness and tapping into your life energy through a powerful connection with your partner.

It might sound a bit mystical or abstract at first, but many people are drawn to the idea of experiencing sex in a more meaningful and conscious way. That’s why in this article, we’re diving into what tantric sex is all about, the benefits it offers, and how you can start practicing it to enhance both your intimacy and overall well-being.

What is tantric sex?

Ever wondered what “tantric” actually means? It refers to practices that come from Tantra, a spiritual tradition focused on achieving enlightenment by channeling sexual energy. Unlike conventional sex, which often centers around reaching orgasm, tantric sex emphasizes deep connection between partners : physically, emotionally and mentally.

So how does it work? The practice involves slowing things down, using mindful breathing, and maintaining deeper, more intentional eye contact. The goal is to extend pleasure and reach a state of "meditative ecstasy." It might sound purely spiritual or even a bit abstract, but research — like the study by Diamond (2004) — has shown that tantric sex can boost sexual satisfaction and deepen intimacy between partners. And those aren’t the only benefits.

Benefits of tantric sex

Stronger emotional connection

One of the biggest benefits of tantric sex is that it strengthens and deepens the bond between partners by encouraging more honest and meaningful communication. And we're not just talking about words — it's also about eye contact, syncing your breath, and taking the time to touch each other with intention. All of this helps both people feel more emotionally connected. It’s a deeply intimate way to build empathy and understanding in the relationship.

Greater control over sexual energy

Tantric sex doesn’t just help you connect more deeply with your partner, it also gives you greater control over your erections and ejaculation. Through breathing techniques and muscle control, it allows you to extend the duration of sex. With better control, both your pleasure and your partner’s can increase, and for men, it can help delay ejaculation. In fact, a study by Brotto et al. (2016) found that mindfulness practices related to Tantra can help reduce premature ejaculation and improve sexual response.

More pleasure and multiple orgasms

Because tantric sex focuses on energy rather than just physical stimulation, it can lead to more intense orgasms . And for women, even the possibility of multiple orgasms. Building on the previous point, the more control you develop over your sexual energy, the easier it becomes to experience different levels of pleasure and to bring more pleasure to your partner as well.

How to practice tantric sex

1. Set the mood

The environment is always important when it comes to sex, but even more so with tantric sex. To fully relax and connect, create a calm, peaceful space. Choose a quiet room with soft lighting, candles, and soothing scents like incense or essential oils to help set the tone.

2. Practice synchronized breathing

Mindful breathing  is at the heart of tantric practices. So it’s time for you and your partner to try it together and learn to sync your breath. Start by sitting face-to-face and breathing in unison. This helps align your energy and fosters emotional connection. Another technique is circular breathing, where one person inhales while the other exhales, creating a flowing rhythm between you.

3. Maintain eye contact

Looking into each other’s eyes without distractions has been shown to create a much deeper emotional connection. That’s one of the reasons it’s such a key part of tantric sex . It helps break down emotional barriers and strengthens intimacy. There’s a reason people say “the eyes are the window to the soul.”

4. Use conscious touch

Not sure what conscious touch is? It means slow, intentional caresses. Touch that’s deliberate and focused. This kind of physical connection helps awaken sexual energy, making it great for before, during, and even after sex. If it’s new to you, try exploring your partner’s body without rushing, paying close attention to every sensation. It’s a powerful way to reconnect and rediscover each other, which can lead to better communication in bed.

5. Control your sexual energy

Tantric sex isn’t about rushing to orgasm, but about drawing out pleasure for as long as possible. One technique is edging , where you pause stimulation right before climax to build intensity.

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Conclusion

Tantric sex is a powerful tool that can help transform your sexuality and your partner’s into a deeper, more fulfilling experience. By bringing together breathwork, mindfulness, and emotional connection in your intimate moments, you won’t just enjoy sex more: your relationship will grow stronger, and you’ll likely experience greater satisfaction in all areas of life, both in and out of the bedroom.

Like anything worth learning, it takes practice and patience, but the physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits make it well worth incorporating into your intimate life.

Sources

• Diamond, J. (2004). Tantric Sex for Men: Making Love a Meditation. Destiny Books.
  
  

• Brotto, L. A., Chivers, M. L., Millman, R. D., & Albert, A. (2016). Mindfulness-Based Sex Therapy Improves Genital-Subjective Arousal Concordance in Women With Sexual Desire/Arousal Difficulties. Archives of sexual behavior, 45(8), 1907–1921.  j